Thursday, May 5, 2011

Have you lost weight?

Man, that is a LOADED question.  Loaded in the sense....that dependant upon my mood - the response can be loaded with all kinds are sarcasm and nastiness.  As we all know, I am involved in a "Biggest Loser" type contest - where the goal is to lose weight.  So to answer the question directly - YES I have lost weight - not as much as I could have or should have, but a loss nonetheless.  Now....for the rant...
"have you lost weight?" is a dangerous question - no matter if you are asking a man or woman.  To ask the question implies that the QUESTIONER feels that the QUESTIONEE has weight to lose.  Most people have weight to lose.  And they likely KNOW that they have weight to lose - but it's their dirty little secret - deep down they are are hoping that no one notices the few extra pounds, that no one notices the little muffin tops peeking out over their jeans, and then they are EXPOSED - "have you lost weight?".  *gasp* - the dirty little secret is not that secret is it???? 
Now, for the QUESTIONEE - there's no malice intended.  Asking the question is just an ice breaker - a compliment really.  What they are intending to say is - " are looking good - trim and svelte - keep up the good work!"  But asking if you have lost weight is easier - puts the onus on the QUESTIONEE to divulge information and saves the QUESTIONER from having to dish out a true compliment.  An issue that will be exposed in a later Blog - Our generation's complete inability to compliment and share positive energy with one another.
So - in the end - be careful.  Weight is a VERY sensitive issue for a lot of people - regardless of their perceived level of fitness and confidence.  Try some general compliments - "wow, you are looking great" - is perfect.....your friend will get the message that you noticed an improvement, he/she will feel a little better, you will have passed your message along - Win win!  BUT - if this doesn't work for you...try this "thought you were on a diet? you're still pretty chunky..."  Let me know how you make out..... ;)

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